KENSINGTON GORE - COMING SOON!

KENSINGTON GORE - THE CHARACTERS...

Hello beasties!

This week - in the first of two posts - it's time to look at another of my projects that is almost ready to  release. It's the third project that I have completed and published, so far, in 2016 - although I've been working on it for nearly 18 months. Each of these projects is its own little world and hopefully one of them will appeal to you, dear reader.

This post we are looking at the characters that feature in this newest projects, KENSINGTON GORE... As with HOT STUFF!! it is a script novel - the first of a series, although it is possible to read it in its own right without knowing any of the recurring characters, some of whom also appeared in my BEAST OF FRIENDS series which reached its conclusion last year.

I'm excited to announce that this new project will be released on Sunday 1st May 2016...

KENSINGTON GORE - SEASON 1...

Here we present the names of those involved in the events that feature during the following scripts:

Warren Helix

Warren comes from a very weird family – whilst he himself is pretty normal fellow! He will also be familiar to those readers who followed THE BEAST OF FRIENDS series.

Katrina Hortensia

Katrina is a white witch – although in the past she was quite the hell-raiser… She will also be familiar to those readers who followed THE BEAST OF FRIENDS series.

Lucy Stammers

Lucy is the third member of the team – a level-headed tough nut in her mid-20s. She appeared in the forth and final season of THE BEAST OF FRIENDS and also began dating Colin just before his untimely death.

Sir Eddie Eden

The mysterious man from the Ministry – also Warren, Lucy and Katrina’s boss.

Ashley Helix

Warren’s mother – she can be a menace at times, but has a great deal of influence…

Pat and Michael Jenkins

New tenants who have moved into The Gore with their sinister, ghostly children…

Copernicus Smith

A ghost and also a friend of the team – he is quite an admirer of Warren’s…

Jack Archer

Turns up working in the area with his eye firmly on Lucy – he has a lot of secrets...

Dr Matt Simmons

A doctor friend of Katrina’s who is called in to help with her vampire cow collection...

P.J.

A telepathic friend of Lucy’s who works in the local bar – The Disgruntled Yak. He only makes a brief appearance during season one - but will return in later seasons...

Lombardo Braithwaite

A gentleman who is very much interested in getting his hands on the vampire cows.

Adrianna

A mysterious tenant of The Gore flats who will play a big part in the 2nd season...

Next time we'll be looking at aspects of the actual plot of this first season of KENSINGTON GORE - without giving away too many spoilers...
 

Before we go I'd like to remind you about A YETI WAY OF THINKING, that was published a couple of weeks ago. It's been selling well, so I'd like to thank everyone who's bought it so far for supporting me and also to THE BEARGRRIAN GAZETTE for making it their book of the week for the third week in a row.

A YETI WAY OF THINKING contains over 80 new poems, stories and vignettes by Paul Chandler, a.k.a. Shy Yeti, written between Autumn 2012 and Summer 2014. They include: ARE THEY AWARE I’M A WEREWOLF?, GIN GOBLINS, INFAMY AND CURRANT BUNS, I USED TO BE A TEN, MYSTERY HEN, ONION MAN, PICCADILLY IS A RUBBISH CIRCUS, TWO VAMPIRE HUNTING YETI, YOU’LL DO and many more…

Pbk: http://www.lulu.com/content/paperback-book/a-yeti-way-of-thinking/18213326 £8.99

Hbk: http://www.lulu.com/content/hardcover-book/a-yeti-way-of-thinking/18214369 £14.99

I hope you enjoy the new book!

That's about it for this time - I'll be back with something new on Wednesday - so check back then, please, if you have time as I have a new prose piece for you... It's slightly sinister too!! 

More soon!

Yeti hugs,

Paul xx

This post and all contents are Copyright Paul Chandler, 2016.

FURRY FRIENDS AND DAFT DITTIES...

A NEW POEM ABOUT CATS...

Hello beasties!

What a handsome cat! Who is he? It's Deeley, of course! Isn't he sweet? (Believe me, you want to say yes or else you might find Deels sat on your head with a very disapproving expression on his face!) Originally I'd intended to gift you this new poem over Easter, instead of giving you an egg - but Shy Yeti's latest escapades got in the way instead. Poems are a lot better for you than eggs, of course - so I'm doing you a favour anyway! I know one shouldn't judge when one is as spherically-shaped as I am, but I do think you're all looking a little tubbier than normal, at the moment. Not worked off the Christmas pudding yet? I know... It's difficult. I actually lost some weight recently, but I'm STILL fat! Big-boned, I say... Boy! That's some large bone... Oh my... This is beginning to sound a tad X-rated, so I'm going to stop... Happy Easter, alright?! Enjoy Deeley!! There won't be ANY chocolate - just cattiness! Oh, yes... Catty to the end, that's me!

Oh - before I go any further I should stop to announce the exciting news that I have a date for my next Poetry Cafe show. It's going to be Friday 8th July 2016 and I'm also very glad to be able to announce that John Smallshaw has confirmed his availability. It just wouldn't be the same without him! Here's a poster advertising the event - which I intend to use as an opportunity to celebrate the recent publication of my A YETI WAY OF THINKING collection.

For that matter I'll probably end up performing the new poem included here - or one or two of the prose pieces published on the blog lately; you shall just have to come along and see for yourself.

Moving on, and you will, no doubt, have noticed that this is our second post of the week... It's just something I'm trying over Easter whilst I have an extra lot of material to share with you. This post contains the first poem that  have completed in quite some time - I actually started it last year and only recently returned to it thanks to all the pretty photos that Toby and I have been taking of daft Mr Deeley, of late...

So, I'm returning to old territory here - yes, indeed - it's a poem about cats with an obvious pun for a title! Yes, it's Shy Yeti at his daftest; I do hope you enjoy it, anyway! As I say, it's taken a while to finish and even when I thought I'd completed it, not so very long ago, I managed to over-write most of the last verse having spent all evening working on it! Luckily I could remember most of what I'd written - but not completely... Most frustrating! It's amazing how long a rather daft ditty can take to write - they're not dashed off in five minutes you know! Not at all! (No matter what those grumpy poets who never use rhyme may try and tell you about us "doggeral" writing folk...) I might add that I think it has echoes of one of my favourite cat poems that I have written, BECOMING MORE CAT-LIKE - especially due to the little choruses at the beginning and end of the verse; these being last minute additions to the piece on the 5th April 2016. As I say, I kept on tinkering with this poem - I really need to get it posted and out there for you to have a look at! I do hope you like it...

Whilst I think of it, I have news on the next Poetry Cafe show - it seems more likely that it will take place in July, as it looks like they may have some Friday night slots free - whereas in May all those are gone. I am just waiting for confirmation on an exact date - but it's looking hopeful! For those of you who may have forgotten, this show is to celebrate the recent publication of A YETI WAY OF THINKING - my first completely new book of poems and stories since NOT AS SHY AS I WAS back in November 2013! I know! I know... I'm slowing down... There were times that I released three poetry books a year... Of course, in reality it's not that I've slowed down at all - but I am writing less prose and verse whilst I've been working on my script-books! It's nice to have a slightly different priority after all these years of making poetting my main project... All that said, I'm really very excited to share A YETI WAY OF THINKING with you - and I really love all the new material included in it - it's had time to be performed and for it to percolate until the versions that appear in the book are truly the best versions that I could have included.

Next week, in the first of two posts, I'm going to start telling you about the first season of my new script-book, KENSINGTON GORE, looking firstly at the characters that are involved before moving on to the story a little more the following week. After that I'll be sharing with you some behind-the-scene photos that I took to promote this project and the book will probably be out soon after that, in early to middle May. It's pretty much ready now, but I don't want to flood the Yeti market so soon after my last book... There will probably be another volume of each of my scripted-series coming out before the end of the year, but more on those when we get there!

In between each of the posts on the new script-book, the second post of each week - I intend to post a new yeti sketch or piece of prose... This way I keep a balance between promoting the new material and sharing new stuff that I'm working on which I publish exclusively on the blog.

Anyway, enough of that for now - time for that new poem - I hope you enjoy it!

More soon - take care!

Yeti hugs,

Paul xx

PURRFECT...

It's quite a purrfect way of living - 

Is life curled up on a mat...

But would I really want their life?

The fur - the tail of just a CAT!?

And yet...

A cat's life IS all but purrfect...
They will do just as they please!
See them watch the goggle-box -
Perched there upon a strangers knees!

Their days are often quite a snooze...
But they don't seem to really care -
About what anybody thinks -
Concerning random nostril hair!
They do not keep a strict routine...
They leave most people quite in awe...
They have a confidence, unique...

Which you can hear within their snore...

There isn't much a cat need do -
Most focus though on taking naps...
They'll share their cheese with all the mice...
But still help set out all the traps...

A cat's life is simply purrfect...
In truth, it's really pretty swell...
They are gifted with nine lives...

Some moggies use them too... Do tell!

Some they like to see the world -
Dress up in a smart new suit...
They grab a cup of milk to go -
Then head off on their long commute!
Although it's rumoured some cats hunt -
Most you'll find curled in a ball...
A few will swing from chandeliers - 
Yet crash cross-eyed into a wall...

They'll give you love to earn their keep -
They truly are the chosen few...
But don't expect to work too hard -
To get themselves a good review...

A cat's life is really purrfect -

And so, there isn't any doubt...

That what a kitty wants they'll get -
Demands come loud as any shout...
You cannot tell a cat, "Just STOP!"

They will ignore those kind of words...

They'll never be best friends with mice -

With bunnies, gold-fish or with birds...
They cannot help the way they act -
Nor can they edit what they do...

It's just a puss-cat way of life -
Their love is earned; no say have you!
One minute ever-so alert...
The next they seem so darned sedate...
Yet each sleeping feline left to lie -
Is paused to pounce; just laid in wait!!

It's a purrfect way of living - 
Yes, you may disagree with that...

But if I get a second chance...

Then I'll demand, "MAKE ME A CAT!!"

The Deeley photos in this post were taken by both myself and Toby W - he took all the close-up shots, this time. All contents of this post are Copyright Paul Chandler, 2016.