IT MEANS NOTHING TO ME... (#FALSE NEWS!)

A WELCOME RETURN TO VIENNA!

Hello beasties!

This week I'll be telling you a little about my recent trip to Vienna - sharing a few stories and photos from the trip along the way...

First up let me tell you about our latest two podcast episodes - the first is one that we recorded earlier this year but which was postponed because other episodes shuffled in the way ahead of it...

THE SHY LIFE PODCAST - 191: YETI UNCLE JOHN'S LEAVING PARTY...

Here we are for episode 191 - in which Yeti Uncle John prepares for his new job in outer space - but some of the regulars are concerned by what lies in store for their old friend... There are also SUTTON PARK clips from 1994 - a short story and also some flashbacks from some of John's finest moments on the show. All this and number of our contributors call in to give their best wishes. Our next episode, number 192 sees us heading back onto Radio Wey - but Zap has plans to spoil all the fun. Do join us, won't you?! Please email me at shyyeti@yahoo.co.uk if you have any comments - you can even send me a sound-file and I'll include it on the show. The music is by Shy Yeti and Luca. Sound effects by Paul Chandler and Soundbible. All content of this episode is Copyright Paul Chandler, 2018. Episode 191 was recorded between the 18th and the 24th April 2018, with some additional recording on 1st September 2018.

This episode can be downloaded on iTunes, Acast, Podbean and also from Soundcloud at the following link:

191: https://soundcloud.com/shyyeti/the-shy-life-podcast-191-yeti-uncle-johns-leaving-party

By the way, the SUTTON PARK clip which appears in this edition comes from episodes 321 and 322 - which were made around March 1994. Additionally to this there are flashbacks to some of Yeti Uncle John's previous appearances - these clips came from episodes 43, 111, 128 and... erm... one other episode but I seem to have lost track as to which it was as these flashbacks were inserted quite randomly and at speed at the last minute, whilst editing! D'oh! You'll hear how much deeper John's voice was at the start - and also hear what happens when he and Ikk try to sing - meet a giant talking flower and get to ask questions of the legendary Deadiegrams.

Next up we head out on to local radio - but it soon appears that all is not expected to go smoothly...

THE SHY LIFE PODCAST - 192: LOOK INTO MY EYES... ON THE RADIO!

Here we are for episode 192 - in which Paul seeks hypnotic assistance from Cromitty to relax him before a big radio show - but Zap has plans to turn a night of poetry and prose into a night of complete disaster - LIVE on the airwaves!! Thank you very much to my guests Tim Mitchell and Nathan Jones for their part in this episode and thanks again to Radio Wey for inviting me on. Our next episode, number 193 is all about what happened when Paul and some of the team went to Marseilles earlier in the summer. Do join us, won't you?! Please email me at shyyeti@yahoo.co.uk if you have any comments - you can even send me a sound-file and I'll include it on the show. The music is by Shy Yeti and Luca. Sound effects by Paul Chandler and Soundbible. All content of this episode is Copyright Paul Chandler, 2018 - except for the stories that Nathan read; of which he owns the Copyright.  Episode 192 was recorded between the 26th June and the 28th July 2018.

This episode can be downloaded on iTunes, Acast, Podbean and also from Soundcloud at the following link:

192: https://soundcloud.com/shyyeti/the-shy-life-podcast-192-look-into-my-eyes-on-the-radio

Next up, I'd like to tell you about my recent trip to Vienna with Toby. I won't be doing a detailed diary this time; some of it will be covered in the podcast when that is released... On this occasion the background of Vienna is more linked to a little story that we'll be telling on the show - about Cromitty and an mysterious painting and Paul having forgotten a certain event from his previous trip to the city back in 2009. Although in real life I do remember my previous trip pretty well - but I did indeed travel there back nine years ago and there are photos from that trip in my old poetry collection, THE SHY LIFE; which is where the podcast got its name. Anyway... 

So... It was a nice trip... The journey went quickly and although out room wasn't quite what we were expecting - it was a bit of an odd "corner" room with very few windows, however it was also an apartment with a hob, sink, fridge, microwave etc; in the end it worked out pretty well. Being August the weather was pretty warm - although it had been warmer the week before - we did stay relatively local, although had planned to go further originally. We mostly explored local parks - museums - galleries and, of course - restaurants and although the museum quarter, near where we were staying, was very quiet when we arrived on the Sunday (including most of the corner shops being closed!) it was actually a really good area to be staying in. There was a nice breakfast for us in the morning - we tended to eat lunch but then in the evening we brought food back to the room to eat there - Toby and I are big fans of European supermarkets and I especially love to try different kinds of yoghurts... No... Honestly! I do... I could write a dissertation about it! Actually, no - I couldn't... I've never taken notes. I took quite a lot of photos and recorded plenty of background sounds for the podcast - although after what happened in Scotland back in July I left my new laptop at home. I probably didn't record as much as I sometimes have - but I'm afraid that you'll have to blame the heat for that.

Anyway, here are some photos - there will be more saved over for when I release the Vienna episode!

Our Vienna edition should be out sometime in the next couple of months, but probably not before episode 200 - so I'm hoping that it'll be available by late October or early November. Vienna is my last overseas trip of 2018 - I'll be heading back to Kent in November for my birthday - but as far as the podcast is concerned, not only do we have Vienna still to come - but I've also not yet released what I recorded in Marseilles back in May! Oh... And there's at least one more show that I recorded when I was in Kent back in April that I'll be releasing imminently - you can see more about that in a moment.

Next time we'll be talking about further episodes of the podcast and... well... I'm not entirely sure what else I'll be talking to you about. I should probably add that Nick and I recently recorded a new article about the 6th and final story of cult early 80s TV show, SAPPHIRE AND STEEL for Trowby and Lisa's ROUND THE ARCHIVES podcast; in fact it was just released as episode 25 at the following link...

Round The Archives - 25: https://soundcloud.com/user-868590968/round-the-archives-episode-25

There's chat about a lot of other shows - so if you're on the lookout for more podcasts then check it out! Anyway, that's all for now!

Take care - more soon - yeti hugs!!!

Paul (aka Shy Yeti) xx

SHY LIFE PODCAST SHOWS - COMING SOON!!

We're heading busily on through September now - but we've still got plenty of new episodes to present you with between now and New Year's Eve... Of course, we're also recording new shows along the way and so this list tends to change every time I post. Our next really big episode will our 200th edition which should be coming up by mid-October; we'll have a new theme tune for you then too! 

Anyway, here is our current schedule!

193. Wahey! Marseille!

Find out what Mr Yeti got up to whilst in Marseille back in late May 2018.

194. Live Pride48 Show - September 2018

We're live and on the air for our September show - with lots of extra material for the podcast version of the episode!

195. Return Of The Brompton Time Machine

This one has also brewing for quite some time - in fact I started work on it when we lasted visited Brompton Cemetery in early January 2017 and then recorded scenes with a number of guests throughout 2017; finally I'm ready to release it!

196. A Call-Back From A Far-Off Place

Flashback Episode. Paul falls for a trick which leads him to a far off place and meets an old nemesis... or two!

197. ...And Suddenly It Was 1988!

In which Paul and Nick discuss the music of 1988 in both the UK and US.

198. Long-Lost Cousin Algernon

Dameus interviews all manner of podcasting celebrities as part of his return to the chat-show circuit.

199. The Invasion Of The Shelving Imps

Paul shows the gang around the library during the college summer holidays - only to realise that the Shelving Imp problem may well be getting out of hand... Please Note: Depending quite when the live show falls during October - episode 199 may be our live edition for the month (which is technically our 200th show if you include the pilot!) In which case this episode about the shelving imps will probably appear as episode 201 or round-abouts.

200. The Murder Mystery Weekend

It's episode 200 and we celebrate with a very special murder mystery weekend!

### Additionally:

There will - most probably - be live shows every month; maybe even more than one closer to Christmas; but we also have plenty of other episodes either in planning or partially recorded.

### A Trip To Vienna

Paul takes Cromitty and Toby to Vienna to revisit old haunts, although Cromitty soon becomes concerned that something strange may have happened to Paul on his first visit, 9 years before.

### The Return Of Dameus The Interviewer

Dameus interviews all manner of podcasting celebrities as part of his return to the chat-show circuit.

### Re-connecting With The Past

Paul catches up with Cromitty and Martin and is excited to learn that Cuthbert has a few added advances that makes it possible to re-connect with the past via old episodes of SUTTON PARK... Ikk is slightly doubtful about it all - but he and Paul soon get to experience the process first-hand.

### Bettina and the robot butler

This episode sees Paul visiting Bettina only to find out that the house has recently become robotically automated; also Wifey Jo play a card game with Cuthbert.

### The Great Bingo Scam

Someone is rigging the bingo so that they win - is it one of the regulars or someone more sinister?

### More About The Alien Book

We learn a little more about The Alien Book which made Ikk so unwell at the start of the year - but, of course - things are never simple.

### Digging Into Unheard Of Places

Paul digs through the archives to find a few interesting conversations that never made it onto shows. This episode has been postponed due to recent technical difficulties and was replaced with another episode, but will be rescheduled during the autumn once more material has been set aside.

### The Halloween Episode 2018

Paul and the gang find that celebrating Halloween is harder than usual in 2018.

This post and all contents are Copyright Paul Chandler, 2018.

A KENTISH DIARY

A WEEK OFF FOR CREATIVE WHATNOTS...

Hello beasties!

This week I'm going to tell you a bit about what I got up to on my week off between Friday the 31st March and Friday the 7th April 2017... It was a really lovely week - just as good as the one I spent there last summer. Once again, I'd have been quite happy to have spent a couple more weeks there. I managed to have quite a lazy time and yet managed to work on some editing and post two new podcast episodes - not to mention all the new shows that I recorded. I watched loads of films, had a day-trip to Canterbury - spoke to friends in the States and took lots of photos whilst out and about... The weather was pretty good too; but I shall tell you in a little more detail... imminently!!

First up I'd like to share with you my most recently published episode of THE SHY LIFE PODCAST...

THE SHY LIFE PODCAST - 67: ADVENTURES ON THE OTHER SIDE... (1 OF 2)

Here we are for episode SIXTY SEVEN - where Paul and Yeti Uncle John begin recording their latest show - but once they are done some rather odd things begin to happen to Mr Yeti after he jumps on the wrong bus. It may take a little while for him to get back too!! Guest stars this time include Toppie Smellie, TLB Tim and Deadiegrams. Some sections were scripted by Paul Chandler, with ad-libs by the cast. Thank you to TLB Tim and TLB James for the use of a small section of episode 222 of Tastes Like Burning, Copyright TLB, 2016. Our next episode, number 68 - sees Mr Yeti continuing his adventure on "the other side..." in the 2nd part of a two part adventure!! It'll be out soon!! Both Tastes Like Burning and The Smellcast are available from iTunes. Please email me at shyyeti@yahoo.co.uk if you have any comments - you can even send me a sound-file and I'll include it on the show. The music is by Shy Yeti and Luca. This episode and all contents are Copyright Paul Chandler, 2017. Episode 67 was recorded between the 4th February and the 3rd March 2017.

This episode can be downloaded on iTunes, Acast, Podbean and also from Soundcloud at the following link:

67: https://soundcloud.com/shyyeti/the-shy-life-podcast-67-adventures-on-the-other-side-1-of-2

I'm pleased with this new episode - it took a while to put together and involved me writing scripts for some of the dialogue and also for the next show. I may share those little scripts for you in upcoming posts; we'll see. It did take me a while to decide on the final title for the episode - at one stage or other it was briefly christened THE AFTER-LIFE (which is what the files were entitled on my phone) and also DEATH ETC. 

So, here's some of what I got up to during my week in and around Lyminge, near Folkestone...

Friday 31st March 2017

Today went quickly - although there was a lot of travel involved. I didn't leave home until 11am, but was safely ensconced in my little flat in Lyminge near Folkestone by 3pm. The rest of the day I let slip by whilst I unpacked and watched a bit of TV (80s sitcom, Sink Or Swim), although I did record around 10 minutes of the first SHY LIFE PODCAST that I have planned for the trip. What was recorded was all the links for the first of the 3 linked episodes that I am recording whilst away (although there are a number of other segments and a Halloween episode that I also intend to record!) It was nice to have gotten there safely and I went out for a little walk before dark... I didn't have a great deal planned for the next day - but what I did have planned meant that an early night was probably advisable... In the end I'm not sure that I did go particularly early, but there you go... #sleepyyeti

Saturday 1st April 2017

I didn't go too far today - but I was certainly up busy! The day began early with some recording with Toppie Smellie for a whole number of forthcoming episodes. I'd like to say more - but I think I really ought to keep things under-wrap for a little longer. For the rest of the day I was busy editing episode 65 of the podcast, although I did head down to the local shop in Lyminge to buy some extra provisions. (Wine!! Okay... Not JUST wine!) On top of all this I also did a lot of recording - ranging from one of my Shy Yeti scripts to scenes from a number of episodes that I'll be posting over the next couple of months. Most of these scenes were recorded inside, as although it was sunny it was also quite breezy outside. I also stayed up late to go on the Poke It With A Stick podcast for the first time in 2017. I didn't say a lot, but I did chuckle quite a bit just to remind people that I was still there.

Sunday 2nd April 2017

Sunday also began early - not quite as early as Saturday, but I was up before 7 to get ready to record with ThatPeterG from LOTSL - an interview that I've been keen to do and aim to post as episode 66 later in the week. Recording with Peter went very well and that episode was pretty much recorded in one sitting, which was nice. That morning I also recorded another random question section for a future episode along with links for future episodes that I intended to record in the week. The rest of the day is a bit of a blur - made up of films, naps and... I honestly don't remember much more of note!

Monday 3rd April 2017

Another sunny day and once I'd done some recording for my Halloween episode up in my apartment (!) and also published episode 65 I got outside and recorded some more for the Halloween episode and also some links for a "little shooooow!" that I recorded with Toppie on Saturday. I even recorded a short video to advertise that episode which I'll be able to release nearer the time. I managed to record quite a lot all in all, that day - although I didn't go far - deciding to postpone my Canterbury trip until tomorrow.

Tuesday 4th April 2017

Today I headed for Canterbury - it wasn't the sunniest of days, but I did record quite a bit for a number of forthcoming episodes! All that and I had a nice lunch in Pret, had coffee and cake in Marks And Spencers and managed to spend a bit on DVDs and blurays in HMV. My only slightly negative experience was just how busy everywhere was - not just with schoolkids on Easter holidays, but hundreds (and literally hundreds!) of French school-children visiting the city and taking up all the space in what I had presumed was going to be a nice peaceful park... (It was quiet there last summer when I last visited!) Never mind - they moved on pretty quickly and although I had to share the place with some students playing football, it was slightly quieter than it was when I arrived. Not only did I get plenty of material for my show - I was able to record some bits for Toppie Smellie's Stick It Out Your Backdoor for The Smellcast. I made it home safely and continued work on editing projects - it was definitely my busiest day of my week and the furthest afield that I travelled from Lyminge.

Wednesday 5th April 2017

I stayed put for most of the day - but was certainly no slouch... I was busy working on episode 66 - which featured the ThatPeterG interview that I recorded on Sunday. Although not much editing was required it still took a while to edit and to shuffle a few segments around. As far as recording was concerned I recorded 26 different segments - most of them for the episodes that I'd been working on  - but also one or two more for short appearances on both Big Fatty Online and Vera Speaks... For Real. At one stage I thought I make take another trip out of the village on Thursday - and so I wanted to get as much completed as possible. In the end it was unnecessary as I didn't go so far - but it was still good to get things done. There was still plenty of time to get out for a little outdoor recording, not to mention time to watch more of the (many) films and TV programmes that I had brought with me. 

Thursday 6th April 2017

Plans for today were a bit uncertain beforehand as I was half expecting it to be raining - but in the end the weather turned out to be really pleasant and so I was able to spend the morning backing up all my holiday recordings - but then head on out to do my last bit of outdoor location work for this trip. I also got a chance to catch up with my old friend Ceri, who I went to University with and who appeared in many of the first 1000 Sutton Park episodes between 1993 and 1995. Once we were done chatting I headed out to record the last scenes that I had planned for the episodes that I'd been working on. As I mentioned, it was a far sunnier day than I'd expected and I didn't fancy walking anywhere too energetic, but recorded a scene from an episode involving Charlie Grrr and then the last scenes of both my Halloween and third Kent episode - although due to a light breeze I ended up doing some of the final conversations back at my apartment, as it allowed me to focus a bit more on the voices and not worry about people suddenly showing up and wondering why I was doing a silly accent. In the evening I watched the last of the TV that I'd brought with me and prepared for an appearance on another little show - which actually I didn't record until the early hours of Friday...

Friday 7th April 2017

As mentioned my Friday began early - at about 1.30, when I rose so that I could appear on another episode of LOTSL (my 3rd successful appearance, not counting the first time - about a year ago when I couldn't access Skype when it came to recording time!) I did manage to go back to bed for a while - but was up by around eight to finish packing, have breakfast and to be ready to depart around 9.30. Yes! It was already time to head home... The week went by so quickly - and yet I couldn't have asked for a better one! I achieved a great deal! As it was I was lucky and caught a bus just after 10 and was at Folkestone Railway Station in good time to pick up some lunch and then get a train back to London soon after 11, reaching Waterloo with time to pick up a ticket and get the 1.20 train home and was back in my flat by 2pm.! Once in I unpacked, had a nice soak in the bath - received shopping and then enjoyed supermarket pizza for dinner! Result!! I do hope that I can go back to Lyminge in 2018!

Here are some more holiday photos that I'd like to share with you... 

I'm not yet sure quite when I'll be releasing the episodes that I recorded in Kent - quite possibly not until June and one of them won't be going anywhere until Halloween! Recording this episode also made me consider what I'd like record to celebrate my birthday, as it occurs around the same time of year as Halloween... I've pretty much worked it all out - and it should be another goodun'; a two-parter, one part going out before my birthday and one once I have returned.

Anyway... Let's turn away from discussing October and November! We have a lot of other things to look forward to before then - although this is all we have time for this post!!

Next time, I should have another podcast episode to tell you about and we'll hopefully have recorded our next live show - which should take place on Pride48 on Sunday 16th April 2017 (Easter Sunday)  at 4pm (EDT) and 9pm (GMT) on Pride48...

Take care - more soon,

Yeti hugs,

Paul (aka Shy Yeti) xx

This post and all contents are Copyright Paul Chandler, 2017.

SHY YETI IS AWAY... AGAIN!!!

A FEW DAYS IN LUXEMBOURG... 

Hello beasties!!

I'm well and truly back from holiday now - in fact I've been home over a week! I want to tell of my adventures, but first I've a couple of new podcast episodes to share with you... The first one was recorded back in July and features my brother and my niece - it really is quite the silliest (and possibly strangest) episode yet! The second one mainly features Erik from The Hysteria Continues podcast talking about horror and 80s music - not to mention me having a wander around Hyde Park...

THE SHY LIFE PODCAST - 18: WE ARE FAMILY... (MEET BEE-BUMBLE!!)

Here we are for episode EIGHTEEN - and I have recorded probably the strangest and silliest episode yet! My brother, Graham and niece, Alena were visiting my parents and it gave me the chance to catch up with them. I'd not seen them for three years! Things all begin quite normally with a chat about horror films and music - but then suddenly things take an odd turn... Have you ever heard of the band, Bee-Bumble!? No... But you will do... Wanna try Alena's jelly-bean challenge! (I'd take care if I were you!) There is also a new prose piece from Mr Yeti, BUTTERFLY HONEY. It really is a bizarre episode, but fun, I hope!! Thank you to Graham, Alena for appearing on this show and also to mum and dad who also briefly cameo. I am aiming to get episode 19 of the show ready in the week or so! Please email me at shyyeti@yahoo.co.uk if you have any comments. The music is by Shy Yeti and Luca. This episode and all contents are Copyright Paul Chandler, 2016. Episode 18 was recorded between the 24th and the 25th July 2016. BUTTERFLY HONEY appears on my blog at the following link: http://thedaffypoet.blogspot.co.uk/2016_07_31_archive.html

This episode can be downloaded on iTunes, Acast, Podbean and also from Soundcloud at the following link:

18: https://soundcloud.com/shyyeti/the-shy-life-podcast-18-we-are-family-meet-bee-bumble

THE SHY LIFE PODCAST - 19: TALKING ABOUT... POP MUSIC!! (AND HORROR FILMS!!)

Here we are for episode NINETEEN - and this one really is our longest show, so far! Our special guest is Erik From The Hysteria Continues Podcast - the podcast that got me into listening to podcasts in the first place! We mainly talk about horror films and the 80s - with a very special edition of Vinyl Vault!! Not only that but Mr Yeti takes you for a walk through Hyde Park and Kensington to have a little natter about what he's been up to and also has a quick chat with Calum... Our next three episodes 20-22 are a trilogy of shows recorded down in Kent in early August! Things get a little different... I am aiming to get episode 20 posted in the next week or so! Please email me at shyyeti@yahoo.co.uk if you have any comments. The music is by Shy Yeti and Luca. This episode and all contents are Copyright Paul Chandler, 2016. Episode 19 was recorded between the 27th and the 28th July 2016, with additional links recorded on 29th August 2016.

This episode can be downloaded on iTunes, Acast, Podbean and also from Soundcloud at the following link:

19: https://soundcloud.com/shyyeti/the-shy-life-podcast-19-talking-about-pop-music-and-horror-films

Moving on now... Let me tell you a little bit about how we got on in Luxembourg the other week...

We arrived with no trouble on Sunday 21st August 2016 - but didn't do a lot that first day. Monday started off with a good breakfast and overcast skies - but the weather soon picked up and we explored the gorge and old town and had a lovely lunch. By the afternoon we were beginning to flag, as it had become very warm - but we found some good views and an ice cream and I managed to get some postcards to send my mum and also purchased myself a new baseball cap! Holiday souvenir job done - all in the first day!

On Tuesday we had a glorious day-trip to Trier, which really is a splendid little town. We walked down by the river, I took plenty of photos, recorded the podcast and even finished a poem that I'd begun back in 2013... You'll get a chance to read that later in this post. We had a very nice lunch, I had stuffed dumplings - and after exploring the cathedral we headed home - not by train but on a rail-replacement coach which afforded us some lovely hill-top views.

Wednesday we stayed in Luxembourg and visited the museum that concerned the history of the country. We also explored the lower town and walked through the park until we reached a good point to return to street level which enabled us to get back to our hotel - via a street-side café where we stopped for some well-earned ice cream. We didn't do very much at all that evening, catching up with reading and listening to audio plays - getting ready for the next day's escapades.

On Thursday, our final full day of the holiday we went to the city of Metz. It was another hot day and we walked from the station, via the shops and then had a picnic lunch on a little island by a church. I recorded a few important bits for the podcast and took a lot of photos and then we came home about 3.30. Reflecting back we liked Trier and Metz equally, but probably feel that Metz warrants a return visit as we suspect there was quite a bit we didn't see. Next day we headed home - after a nice breakfast and iced coffee in a coffee chain called Coffee Fellows which was very handy in that it was just up the road from our hotel and right opposite the stop that we needed to catch the bus to get us back to the airport. Once again the weather was very sunny - and it was pretty much the same when we got back to London too! If only U.K. trains ran as efficiently as the ones in mainland Europe... (Yes, our train journey home was full of delays, but never mind - we're used to it!)

Here are some photos from the trip... I'm afraid it's a bit of a mix of all three days here and the photos are of Luxembourg, Trier and Metz. 

There will be a few more photos to come, but probably not for a week or two - once the podcast episode from this trip is ready to be released. That said there are one or two that I took deliberately so that they could be used for any posts where a  photo is required; so you may see some more from the trip and not even realise it!!

To end this post I include a daft poem, recently completed whilst away - but more about that in the post-script! 

Coming up next time we'll probably be going back to Kent  as we have reached the episodes that I filmed there in late July/early August... It's going to be a lot of fun - at least that's what it says here...

So, anyway - more soon!

Yeti hugs,

Paul xx

P.S. The following piece was written between the 11th October 2013 and the 23rd August 2016, although I did briefly return to it in January 2014. It was originally entitled THEY FOUND OUR YETI and had been written in shorter verses, rather than one longer piece. It was probably half-written when I returned to it recently - rearranging the order of some of the existing lines. In the end it became a silly piece with a twisted moral - if you love something then lock it away... I really returned to it quite randomly - finding what I had already written on my phone during a day-trip to Trier on 23/08. It was during a period when I had been trying to complete a number of poems that were half-complete, having discussed them on my podcast. I mentioned this piece during the recording of a podcast episode from Luxembourg and also recorded a version of it for that show.

OUR YETI... GONE!!

Our yeti - gone!!

At such a cost!

The poor wee mites -

Are long since lost!

We looked on shelves -

Up on the roof...

But still saw no sign -

Of yeti claw nor hoof!

Behind the fridge?

Out in the shed?

No frantic growls...

We feared them dead!

We looked so hard -

We searched in vain...

On hands and knees!

But, oh the pain!

Boxed up in store?

Coated in dust?

For so many years -

We searched, we fussed...

We did not sleep -

Our vision blurry...

We saw no sight -

Of those so furry...

We left them food -

For they'd be famished!

T'was hard to fathom -

Where they'd all vanished...

We called their names -

We put up posters...

Placed beer mugs -

On their favourite coasters...

But alas, no need -

To get excited...

They did not show -

No yeti sighted...

Our hope now gone -

Our darkest hour...

Life once so sweet -

Now sickly sour...

Until... SUDDENLY -

One summer morn...

The air was filled with -

One large lazy yawn...

Hibernation done...

From the caves came creeping...

Our beasts were back -

Now done with sleeping...

Oh, happy day -

From every nation...

Came yelps of joy -

And celebration!

Our yeti - back!!

So glad they're home...

Locked up tight, to ensure  -

They'll never EVER roam...

This piece and all contents are Copyright Paul Chandler, 2016.